shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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