There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
