I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize
