don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
