i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
the condom got lost in my hair
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize