I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
