There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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