everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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