i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
