i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
