good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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