Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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