Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize