I wish i was in the wii world.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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