Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
