I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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