is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
