I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize
