11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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