I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You're a waste of cheezeits
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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