we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
