Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
