It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
