i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
meet me or not, i'm out of control
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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