what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
