Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
