NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
