You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
