Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
