Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
