Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize