Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
