brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
