I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
