I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize