party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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