they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
If I die, sorry about rent.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
