she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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