i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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