margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize