I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
