i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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