I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
