last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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