Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
