Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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