Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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