What a fucking waste of an outfit
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
