he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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