If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize