This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
